1 Wedding & 3 Funerals
March 6th, 2010 | Personal, Weddings
What a new year it has been. Started it off with one amazing wedding after another. On February 20, I shot one of the most moving weddings ever. Irene and Dylan’s wedding touched me profoundly. Not just how madly they love each other, but those around them. Never seen more teary eyes in a wedding. Irene had me choking when we met for the first time two days before her wedding. “I was moved to tears when I saw your pictures. I knew then I wanted you to be my photographer,” she told me. Irene is every photographer’s dream bride. I am deeply honored.
On top of that, we had a blast running a week-long workshops and seminar with Joe McNally. We made history running the largest photography seminar ever in Malaysia…many who attended claimed it was the best photography seminar they had been. We are privileged to be able to serve the community.
But pain and tragedy soon followed…
First, my friend’s mother passed away followed closely by my grandma. For the first time, I attended two funerals in a week. No the most pleasant place to be at a funeral. It is a day of reckoning where the our lives are tallied and the final accounts recorded. The dead cannot talk, walk or do any more. There is no real lasting legacy. We may save up a lot of money, erect a monument or a building but nothing that’s man made can last forever.
The only legacy is influence. From the eulogies you can tell how much or little they have influenced, taught, blessed, mentored, shaped, and nurtured those around them. It made me thinking about my own legacy. Don’t think it is morbid to think about the end. After all, we should run with the finishing line in mind.
My grandma is one of three women of steel in my life. My mother and wife being the other two. As a single parent, she raised six sons and two daughters. Outlasted her abusive husband. Survived WWII. Put the kids through schools. How did an illiterate woman manage to accomplish that in the 40s and 50s?
Sitting there in the church with the casket next to me, and reflecting on my grandma’s life, I realized where I got that tenacious and stubborn streak from. While I spent limited time with her, there is no mistake that her blood flows in me.
The third funeral is figurative. Losing a friend hurts. The trusted, dependable and loyal friend that had stuck with me in the fox hole is no longer there. The pain is real. It feels like a dagger is stuck in my chest. When I recall the disappointments, the dagger is twisted and turned. It also feels like a funeral because the relationship is dead…it will never be the same again.
When you love people so dearly and they let you down in a big way. It hurts. It hurts deeply. I was told it was good that I could feel the pain because it showed that my heart is soft. “No, I don’t want a soft heart. I want a heart of stone!” I protested. But do I really want that?
Should I stop believing & seeing the best in people? Should I be more cynical? Should I stop being open and real? All because of a few people who disappointed me? Grandma, I know, you wouldn’t be proud of that.
March 6th, 2010 at 6:27 pm
my condolences Louis. i wish i had met your Grandma. the way you describe her and that way she lived her life touched my heart so.. God Bless You.
March 6th, 2010 at 6:49 pm
Hio Louis,
My condolences to you as it also happened to my family of 2 funerals in a week last October.
We have to be strong to get through it and by the way, nice pictures as usual.
Take care
March 6th, 2010 at 7:18 pm
Louis, I knew at the time of our Gorgeous shoot together, that even though you were grieving over your loss of your beloved Grandma, you were the true professional to carry on and wrap up the shoot as planned to return home the next day for her funeral. Amazed by your dedication and professionalism. I have no doubt that you gained your courage and tenacity from her. God bless you and your family.
March 6th, 2010 at 7:39 pm
congrats on your achievement, Louis! you’re one hell of a photographer. no doubt all your clients are moved by your photos.
and also my deepest condolences. may your grandma has a place next to HIM in eternity. God bless you and your family.
“friends come and go, but only true friends leave footprints in your heart”
March 6th, 2010 at 9:18 pm
Our condolences to you and your family Louis. Really sad to hear this about your loss and your grief. Remember that no one grieves over the death of a selfish and nasty person but probably quite the opposite.I hope you’ll always continue to be optimistic and infectious!
March 6th, 2010 at 9:27 pm
Stay strong Louis, good luck and take care.
March 6th, 2010 at 10:45 pm
My deepest condolences to you & your family.. May the love of God strengthen your heart in this tough time…
and…you are also my dream photographer for my future wedding too
March 6th, 2010 at 11:41 pm
Hi Louis,
Thanks again for the wonderful workshop of Joe. Really a great learning experience for me. And I’m also felt sorry for your lost. Hope your grandma will rest in peace. Take care!
March 7th, 2010 at 6:45 am
I lost my grandma too not too long ago. Raising 3 daughters and a son all alone, is something only the toughest people could do. Putting all of them to the finest overseas education all by herself, is something only a loving mother could do.
I’m sorry to hear about your loss and also a trusted friendship. Things might seem blurry or you might not understand why things are these way, but here’s a verse that always remind me that God is in control.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts – Isaiah 55:9″
March 7th, 2010 at 9:47 am
My deepest condolences to you on the passing of your grandma. Her life has left a deep mark on yours.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my short yrs in the world, it is to never trade a soft heart for a heart of stone.
You end up hurting a lot less, but you also lose a whole lot more.
You lose feeling, you lose compassion, you lose trust, you lose love, you lose touch with people, and you lose the opportunity of influencing people deeply. And that’s not something I’m willing to trade even if I have all the pain in the world.
I think the reason your photos are as good as they are and are as meaningful and touching as they are are because of your heart. You take pictures from the heart, and that’s why they in turn touch the hearts of people. It can only be done when your heart is soft and sensitive to people and situations around you =)
God will sustain, God will comfort and God will carry you through the storms.
Blessings.
March 7th, 2010 at 4:47 pm
Stay strong and all the best!
March 8th, 2010 at 1:44 am
My deepest condolences to you and your family on the passing of your grandmother.
Thank you, Louis, for your pictures that never fail to move people’s hearts for God has given you very special eyes to capture beauty and colours, and ultimately a love-filled heart to see love and joy through those eyes. I am sure that you have made your grandma very very proud, and also everyone in your family.
I was just looking at the 2 pictures from Irene and Dylan’s wedding. Although I’ve seen 1 of the pictures on your camera before and then again during the wedding night itself, no matter how many times I’ve seen it
I am still greatly in awe of it. I can’t wait to see the rest!
I still rememeber the day Irene showed me your website when I was at work. It was so difficult to wait till lunch time before I could call Irene. Being in tears, I said… ‘oh my God… Irene… it’s tooooooooooo beautiful… in every single way… Most importantly…you can see love…’ And I know Irene was in tears too, so was her mom. We just couldn’t stop talking about your pictures! And she knew she had found her Godsend photographer
(When we found out that you’re a christian, we cried again… haha ;p)
It’s a great honour to meet you and your team. Thank you also for your cheerful spirit that was uplifting and for trying to make conversation with people close to the bride, including myself.
Having you as the photographer was certainly 1 of the many blessings God poured down that day.
I’ll start praying that you will be available for my own wedding
March 8th, 2010 at 2:27 pm
Deepest condolences to you and your family. Its good for you to be able to pause and reflect about what you want to leave behind in life. It struck me the same thing when I attended my step-brother’s father funeral 2 mths ago. Stay strong buddy!
March 8th, 2010 at 2:46 pm
Dear Louis, our deepest condolence to you and the family. Have a blessed year ahead and as always, you and your team is an inspiration. God guides..
March 9th, 2010 at 1:37 pm
My condolence to you and your family. My grandma passed away few years ago, I felt the same too. When I was on my way back to Tawau to attend the funeral, I couldn’t stop my tears.
March 9th, 2010 at 7:12 pm
Congratulation for your achievement and successful seminar with McNally. Well deserved to be called the best!
Condolence to you and your family. May you all have a blessed future despite the loss..
March 10th, 2010 at 12:54 am
Louis,
My deepest condolences to your family and you. I understand and share your pain. Hang in there.
March 11th, 2010 at 3:01 pm
Hi Louis,
Hope this is not too late. My Deepest Condolences to you, jasmine and your family from sehu and me. I have the same feeling as you a few months after our pre wedding shooting with you. My Grandma pass away just few month before our wedding. It a sad that she could not witness our big day but i know she always with me and wanted me to stay strong.
Stay Strong Louis you can do it….
March 12th, 2010 at 2:37 am
I want to thank you for being such an open and friendly person. I was in your class at WPPI and enjoyed every moment of it. I wanted to tell you in person but there were so many people wanting to speak with you after the class was over that I decided to just send you an email or leave you a comment later. I really hope to be in one of your future classes or workshops.
You said that people in Malaysia are kind and warm and I truly believe that. One of my dearest friends is from Malaysia and even though we are thousands of miles away now our bond is still there. (he lives in HK now).
I learned a lot in your class about lighting but most of all about enjoying and loving my work. I love photography and my passion for art and the stories behind people found a mirror image in your photography. You’re very inspirational and authentic.
Thank you again and I hope our paths cross again in a near and happy future.
Analy Carpio
March 20th, 2010 at 12:00 pm
I was a bit shaken when I read this post,,
I could not say anything..
May 31st, 2010 at 9:38 am
Hi,this is Jeniffer Laliotis,just observed your Blog on google and i must say this blog is great.may I quote some of the information found in your website to my local people?i am not sure and what you think?anyhow,Many thanks!